EXPERIENCES

From time to time, people ask me what they can ‘expect’ from a date with me, a question I struggle to answer. Every single encounter I’ve had in this funny little world has been different, because each experience is rooted in how we connect, what we want to do, where the mood takes us. There are of course some constants - when you make a date with me, you can expect to spend time with someone who genuinely wants to get to know you; who takes joy in your pleasure; and who really wants to have a very good time. You can expect to meet someone who is showing up as her best self; who is throwing herself wholeheartedly into whatever it is we’re doing; and who will go above and beyond to make you feel good.

However, should you need some more suggestions, below are a few of my favourite things to do with a lover, which can be boiled down to four Fs - food, fancies and frolics (the fourth F is silent, but I think you can guess what it is). My favourite dates though, are ones where we lose track of what we’re doing because we’re simply having too much of a good time.

food.

One of my favourite food critics, Marina O’Loughlin, writes about a category of restaurant she has defined as ‘Dadcore’, and when I read this, I have rarely felt more seen. Yes, I’ve been known to perch haphazardly on a stool at the latest East London loft pop-up, or get lost in a ten course tasting menu - but ultimately, my heart belongs to the type of place you can sink into, that makes you feel at home, and that has, as O’Loughlin puts it, “a deep and real indulgence towards over-indulgence”.

I want my dining experiences to be steeped in joy, to focus on simple pleasures like really good bread and butter, comfortable seats, and an interesting wine list which even a novice like me can decipher.

That being said - I do believe there’s a time and a place for every type of food experience, whether that’s pushing the boat out at the latest double starred extravagance; or just a very good pizza eaten on the sofa, preferably post-coitally.

Ultimately, I just am really obsessed with the ritual of dining out. Yes, the food is important, but at the heart of it is the pleasure of sharing a meal with someone, as cliched as it sounds. That special alchemy that few places get right, but when they do, feels like real magic.

You can find some of my favourite London spots here, but it is by no means an exhaustive list and I am always keen to expand my horizons.

fancies.

It’s at this point that I’m contractually obligated to tell you that as well as being quite pretty to look at, I also have a PhD. I know it’s hard to believe that I’ve got both beauty and brains, but you can trust me - I truly chose looks AND books.

Jokes aside, my academic career has been (and still is) a big part of my life, and a curiosity to know more underpins everything I do. However, many years ago I decided to escape the ivory tower for something a little more scandalous, but as a thoroughly modern woman, I like to keep my cultural senses sharp - if only so I can regularly win at my local’s monthly pub quiz.

My love of art and culture is something which runs through everything I do - I’m as comfortable discussing epistemology as I am eroticism, and I can make you laugh about both. Whether you need someone to stroll around the Tate Modern with in companionable silence, or someone to dissect the latest offering at the Garrick with - I’ve always got opinions, and sometimes they’re even good ones.

I’m also a washed up musician - in my opinion, a more glamorous way of saying ‘I did Grade 8 piano at 19 and then gave it all up in a fit of teenage angst’. However, despite being a little rusty on the keyboard these days, my love of music endures and I am always game for a concert, from smoky jazz bars to the majesty of the Royal Albert Hall. The weirder the better, frankly - I once watched someone play half a clarinet on stage for 26 minutes, so if you can top that, I’ll be impressed.

frolics.

Scene:  it’s a warm evening, the sun is setting and the light is pure gold,  bathing a small square with a luminous glow. We’re in Italy, perhaps, or  a small village in the south of France. It doesn’t really matter,  because after a few glasses of wine who cares as long as the food is good and the company is better. You’re sitting, eyes half closed in pure pleasure and relaxation, with a beautiful woman next to you. Her hand is resting gently on your leg, in a gesture of intimacy which hints at things to come. 
It sounds good, right? Well, thankfully, this idyll can easily be made a reality via the magic of fly-me-to-you. Aren’t you lucky?

Whether via planes, trains or automobiles, travel has been a life long hobby of mine, and I’m lucky enough to have experienced more countries than I can remember by the time I was 21. The list has grown since then, but there’s always room for more stamps on my passport.

Travel shows us that what we consider “normal” is not universal. It allows us to grow as individuals, to expand our mindsets in a way which feels increasingly vital in this day and age.

We are lucky to live in an age where the other side of the world is closer than ever, where the distance between us is not really an obstacle in having a very good time together, with a little bit of effort. Perhaps you live in a different country from me, but you’re keen to explore our connection. Or maybe you just want some company on a trip you’ve planned. Whether I’m traveling to you, or traveling with you, I’m happy to pack a bag faster than you can say 'business class flights to Aruba’.